Over the weekend my wonderful husband bought a bouquet for me along with a tin of some of my favorite chocolates. This morning I got a lovely text from him about how much he loves me, and tonight I'm making from-scratch pasta sauce and we'll break open a bottle of wine with our Italian dinner.

My point is actually NOT about any of these.

My point is that these are things we do regularly.

I get a text EVERY morning from him telling me how much he loves me and can't wait to see me tonight. We grabbed the tin of chocolates because it was a big tin and I love Almond Roca and it was an awesome deal. He bought flowers because they were prominently placed at the grocery store, and we sit down and cook an awesome Italian dinner with a bottle of wine at least every month and talk about our days and what we did and what we saw and what happened.

Every year we have the same conversation. We’ll be sitting on the couch on approximately February 8th and I’ll look over and ask: “Are we celebrating Valentine’s day?”

We’ve always ended up at the same conclusion: why?

Matt and I tend to buck the trends. Neither of us are inclined to do anything because ANYONE says we have to or should. If we feel like it, we do it. We end up getting flowers and chocolates and having a fun dinner because it’s fun - but we do that through-out the year too. He doesn’t go out and find expensive jewelry, nor did he propose on Valentine’s Day. Because, let’s be honest, there are thousands and thousands of people who will celebrate Valentine’s Day today - simply because they’ve been told to do that.

My point is this: If you’re waiting for someone else to tell you to celebrate the things that mean the most in your life, like your relationship, you are asking for that relationship to fail. If you’re letting everyone else define the perimeters of how you celebrate those things or how you operate your relationship, you have no one to blame but yourself if that relationship is anything less than you want it to be. You let too many chefs into the kitchen.

Take control of your relationship & define your life and make it what you WANT it to be.

Since I’m a business coach at heart, I’ll leave you with this: How are you doing any differently in your business and is it hurting you there too?

Are you taking control or letting every Tim, John & Harry tell you what to do and how to do it?

Just like in your relationship, find one or two trusted advisers, and move forward with them, but stop letting yourself get buffeted by what the general population seems to think you should do.

Own your relationships. Own your business. Own your life.